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Home > Late Show with David Letterman > Late Show Jokes
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David Letterman: Deer Antler Spray & Alex Rodriguez Leaving Yankees?

Late Show: A-Rod & Antler Spray

David Letterman talked about Ray Lewis’s Deer Antler Spray, rumors of Alex Rodriguez leaving the Yankees, and Discontinued Academy Award categories.

David Letterman: Super Bowl 50-Yard Line Tickets

Who did you root for in this year’s Super Bowl? The Harbaugh brothers faced off, igniting a family rivalry at the New Orleans Superdome. Tickets on the 50-yard line went for $50,000. “You are so close, you can smell the deer antler spray,” Dave said.

Late Show: Ray Lewis Deer Antler Spray

David Letterman: Deer Antler Spray & Alex Rodriguez Leaving Yankees?

David Letterman talked about rumors of Alex Rodriguez leaving the Yankees. (s_bukley / Shutterstock.com)

Before it came up in the context of Ray Lewis, most people had not heard of deer antler spray. But apparently, Lewis used this product to heal his injured tricep. Letterman had a warning for kids about side effects, including “skittishness…and freezing in headlights.”

David Letterman: Super Bowl Dramamine

The Super Bowl aired on CBS in 2013, and they pulled out all the stops to promote the big game. For Super Bowl 47, Dave showed a CBS promo featuring “dizzying camera shots, sponsored by Dramamine.”

Could Super Bowl weekend someday become an official holiday? Super Bowl parties are very popular. Letterman said that Manti Te’O hired an imaginary caterer for his own bash.

Dave said that he would host a Super Bowl party, but it sounded like his guest list only included Paul. Just then, cue card guy Tony Mendez exclaimed that Chinese hackers took over his cue cards, which were written in Chinese characters rather than English letters.

Late Show: Alex Rodriguez Leaving Yankees?

Could Alex Rodriguez be leaving the New York Yankees? If so, he could save them a $200 million salary. “For that, they could get two overpaid disappointments,” according to Letterman.

With that savings, maybe the hot dog prices will go down as low as $22. But what about the ramifications? If the Yankees are in the World Series without A-Rod–never mind. Dave said he will be fine if Rodriguez stays or goes.

David Letterman: Lindsay Lohan Court Appearance

Lindsay Lohan was back in court in early 2013, for “appearance XLVII.” Her Super Bowl party is referred to as an alibi, Letterman said.

Late Show: Discontinued Academy Award Categories

Of course, not long after the Super Bowl are the Academy Awards. In honor of the biggest night in movies, Dave shared one of the Discontinued Academy Award Categories.

In 1957, the award for Best Picture Featuring An Old Man Getting Hit In The Face With Crumpled Paper was bestowed upon 12 Angry Men.

David Letterman: Manti Te’O Girlfriend Hoax

The Manti Te’O hoax has been unmasked, and the man behind the scam appeared on Dr Phil’s show to give his version of the events. The perpetrator’s name is Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, which is a tongue twister, so the Late Show compiled a Mispronunciation Roundup of media figures butchering his name on local news broadcasts around the country.

Filed Under: Late Show Jokes Tagged With: Alex Rodriguez Leaving Yankees, David Letterman Academy Awards, David Letterman Deer Antler Spray, Discontinued Academy Award Categories, Ray Lewis Deer Antler Spray, Super Bowl 50-Yard Line Tickets

   

About Pat Howard

Pat Howard is a writer and editor in Los Angeles. He was born with a remote control in his hand, and is grateful to finally have a haven at Recapo for his pathological love of daytime television.

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