Jimmy Kimmel: New Donald Sterling Lawsuit
Donald Sterling has another lawsuit on his hands. A woman, Maiko Maya King, is suing him because they were in a romantic relationship from 2005-2011. Kimmel said he didn’t know you could sue for that. That wasn’t it though. Sterling apparently subjected her to a steady stream of offensive comments. Kimmel wasn’t buying it.
“He hasn’t had a steady stream in years,” he said. The woman claimed that she became his personal assistant after they split up. She was paid $10,000 a month and got a $100,000 bonus if she slept with him. Apparently she collected it, but is now suing him for an extreme amount of money. Kimmel said that Gloria Allred is her lawyer. He hates her. Sterling hasn’t been lying low, though. He went to an African American church and Access Hollywood later caught him smirking when he was asked if he was racist. Kimmel said we should throw him in water. If he sinks he’s racist, if he floats he’s a potato. It was hilarious. I lost it.
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Woman Attaches Baby to Wedding Dress

Would your dog have fun playing with a fetch machine that one pet owner created? (SJ Allen / Shutterstock.com)
There’s a story that’s getting a lot of attention online. A woman named Shona Carter Brookes from Jackson, Tennessee, who just got married last weekend, accessorized her wedding dress by attaching her one-month-old baby to her train. Kimmel said that her baby was her something new.
People on Facebook are very upset, but she said she didn’t do anything wrong. Kimmel said it wasn’t her fault though; those long, ruffled trains attract babies. She couldn’t help it. The baby wasn’t harmed. He said everything was fine until she did the “Gangnam Style” dance. He showed a picture of their “Just Married” car dragging a bunch of babies.
Jimmy Kimmel: Foreigner or Not Round Two
Kimmel went back to his cousin Sal to play more “Foreigner or Not?” He said that she was American. He got it wrong. She was from Ireland. She got an apple pie. She’s had it before though.
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Fetch Machine
An engineer, who got tired of playing fetch, built a contraption to do it for him and taught his dog how to use it. They played a clip. It’s kind of ridiculous and ingenious. This is the smartest dog in the world! Kimmel thought it was the greatest thing ever and called it a “dogapault.” He joked that the owner’s been dead for two years.
Jimmy Kimmel Live: Foreigner or Not Round Three
Kimmel played another round of “Foreigner or Not?” It was hard to tell if he was a foreigner or a stylish American. He said foreigner. He got it wrong. He was an American from Massachusetts. He got two pies because he’s so skinny.
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