Ellen: DJ Tony’s Karaoke
In recent weeks, Ellen DeGeneres has discovered that her DJ, Tony, doesn’t know many of the lyrics to the songs he plays on the show each da.
Ellen found out that he talked to BET about this, explaining, “I’m a DJ. I know beats and I don’t know song lyrics.” Do you accept Tony’s defense? Either way, Ellen forced him to try remembering the words to some more of the songs he constantly plays on the show.
Ellen: Tony Karaoke Lyrics – “Forget You”
The first song on Tony’s list today was the Cee Lo Green song “Forget You,” and in his defense, there are two versions of it, one with lyrics that aren’t appropriate for daytime TV. He actually did pretty well for the first few lines. Then it fell apart:
“If I could see you running around
Ain’t that some shh, ain’t that some shh
I think my change in the pocket wasn’t enough
So I’m like, forget you
Sorry that I ain’t got money
But that’s the way it always is
See, I might be sex box
But I’m just Atari
Baby, you know I came here”
Does Tony know how songs work? Sometimes they are supposed to make sense. At least he has a sense of humor about his failings in this arena. “What is a sex box?” Ellen wondered.
Ellen: Tony Karaoke “Livin’ La Vida Loca” Lyrics
I’m not sure it’s fair to switch languages on Tony, but I guess he can’t do that much worse in Spanish, with the Ricky Martin ‘90s hit “Livin’ La Vida Loca.”
“Woke up in New York City, she was [mumble]
She looked mighty pretty
She’ll take you [mumble] and then she’ll turn you inside out
She makes you say that love is there and never pull you out
She’s always there to make you shout
Outside, inside out, Livin’ la vida loca”
That does seem to be marginally better, so maybe Tony should stick to older songs.
Ellen: Tony Karaoke “Just Dance” Lyrics
Last on the docket today was Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance,” during which I realized I don’t know some of this song’s gibberish lyrics either. I feel your pain, Tony.
“Red wine, Konvict, uh-huh
I think I’ve had a little bit too much, The wine has got me little touch
[Mumbles] every time I drink too much
Stop, look, see what you got done
I like this record baby ‘cause I can’t sit down anymore”
Poor Tony. Maybe he can bone up on his music lyrical knowledge over the summer.
Ellen: Cinco De Mayo
Ellen DeGeneres and DJ Tony compared notes on their Cinco De Mayo celebrations. DJ Tony said his weekend was “muy bueno,” and Ellen reported that she’d been on her best behavior, sticking to beer instead of margaritas.
Ellen: Classic Joke Monday
The weekly “classic” joke every Monday is probably repeated in countless grade school classrooms every Tuesday. Why can’t they teach some of these jokes to poor Rosie, so she can learn a new one? Here’s what the kids will be laughing about tomorrow.
- What’s the best way to carve wood?
- Whittle by whittle.