Ellen TV: Comedian Amy Schumer
Ellen DeGeneres welcomed the hilarious Amy Schumer to her show. Ellen said she has said it before and then said it again “you’re a very funny woman.”
She said she saw Amy Schumer on Last Comic Standing and that was the last time was on the show. It turns out that was seven years ago! “We haven’t aged a bit,” Amy Schumer said. “Don’t we look amazing?”
Ellen pointed out that Amy has done really well for herself since being on Last Comic Standing. Amy said she was so excited that Ellen wanted to have her on the show, and said it was “the biggest deal for her.”

Amy Schumer joined Ellen to talk about her Comedy Central show, dating, and the Vanity Fair party. (CarlaVanWagoner / Shutterstock.com)
She explained that she was about to go on her first tour and felt very encouraged by Ellen, but claimed she could tell Ellen was trying to warn her that it was going to be hard.
Ellen: Inside Amy Schumer Review
The good news is, now Amy can settle down a bit, because she is staying in New York to do her show Inside Amy Schumer. Ellen said her show is really funny and that Amy herself is really funny.
Amy explained that she grew up watching female comics and she loved watching Gilda, Saturday Night Live, as well as Lucille Ball and Carol Burnett, as well as Ellen herself.
She said to have her own show is a really big deal, and as Ellen said it’s a successful show on Comedy Central as well!
Ellen TV: Amy Schumer Vanity Fair Party
Ellen also pointed out that she went to the Vanity Fair party, which shows that she’s “in with the in crowd.”
“I am very rich and famous,” Amy Schumer said, but then admitted she thought it was a mistake that she was invited to the party. She said even her publicist was confused as to why they were going to “allow her” to be there.
She said she was so excited and brought her sister, and saw Ellen at the party but thought “the nicest thing she could do was not talk to her.”
She said everyone at the party was so famous, she thought she was going to get to the party and someone was going to hand her a tray and tell her to stand at a certain spot “and give out shrimp shumai.”
Ellen TV: Amy Schumer On Feeling Beautiful
She said she and her sister got all dolled up and felt beautiful, and then said every woman has that time when they think “am I maybe gorgeous?” She said she got to the party and felt really good and then she walked in and was “hit with a wall of all the Sports Illustrated swimsuit models” and joked that she realized she wasn’t a real woman, but was instead “harvesting organs for a real woman.”
She also said she knows how to dress and knows what looks good on her to highlight certain areas. She pointed out the spot of her legs right above the knee and her forearm. “This three-quarter length sleeve, this is not an accident,” Amy Schumer joked. “How’s there no ring on this finger? Look at this section.”
She then went on to say that under her shirt was “like a lava lamp” where things are moving and nothing really settles.
Ellen: Amy Schumer Picture With Hemsworth Brothers
Ellen then said she had a picture, but before she showed it Amy wanted to explain what was going on. She said that at the Vanity Fair party, she and her sister saw the Hemsworth brothers, “the most beautiful men,” and she begged her sister to get a picture of her with the two men. She said she was standing in the middle of the two men when her sister snapped a picture.
The picture is dark and blurry, so blurry that you can hardly tell who’s actually in the photo. “I’ve done everything for you,” she shouted at her sister in the audience. “What a failure.”
Ellen TV: Amy Schumer Dating Non-Comedians
Ellen then asked Amy Schumer if she felt the earthquake that happened in California and she said she did and it was her first one. She explained that she had started seeing a new guy and said “you really learn a lot about somebody during an earthquake.”
She said she would have expected him to make sure she was okay but he actually tried to use her as a human shield. “So I’m single!” Amy said.
She said she’s trying to date someone who’s not a comedian and went out the other night with a “civilian.” She said he was talking about being an engineer and she didn’t really know what that meant because she went to a state school. She said she really only understands Halloween costume jobs like fireman and nurse.
She said the guy tried to compliment her on her eyes but she wasn’t having any of it, saying if her eyes were a “thing” she would’ve heard about it by now. So he’s out!
Before she left Ellen surprised her with a giant picture of her with the Hemsworth brothers.
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