Ellen TV: What’s In The Box?
Ellen DeGeneres kicked off her show by asking why we need to wait until the holidays to open gifts. She decided to play “What’s in the Box?” with her audience.
The first audience member had to choose between box number one, curtain number two, and box number three. She went with box number three which had three Blockbuster tapes under it, but actually won $1,500 to Target.
The second audience member was presented with three different covered dishes. She went with number three, since her son is 3-years-old. It had a deck of cards under it, but inside the deck was a $500 American Express gift card. The third audience member chose box number two, which had a bottle of tequila and two limes under it, but what she actually won was a Whirlpool refrigerator with French doors.
A fourth audience member had to choose the right or left cheek, when Ellen told her she had money in a back pocket. She won $500 cash. Another audience member chose box number three for her three kids. Under the box was a package of vegetables, but what she really got was a bonus box. She then chose box number one “because she and her husband are one.” Under box number one was a can of cranberry sauce, and another bonus box. But when it came to what was in the final box, Ellen told her she had to wait until later in the show to see.
Ellen: Classic Joke Wednesday + Dancing Audience Members’ Thoughts
What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he lost his job? Oh snap!
Ellen said Classic Joke Wednesday is one of their Emmy Award Winning classic segments. She said they like to keep it fresh, so she introduced something new. She said with new technology, she was now able to hear what audience members were thinking while dancing. One audience member was thinking about nothing but sugar, while another man was wondering when Dr. Phil was going to walk out. Another guy was thinking about how great his parking spot was.
Ellen TV: Funny Yelp Business Reviews
Ellen explained that Yelp is a website that allows you to read what “regular people” think about restaurants and businesses. She said the thing is, anybody can write anything they want. She also said the bad thing, is that anybody can write anything they want.
She said she was looking for a review of a restaurant and realized two things: she doesn’t know how people have the time to write the reviews, and second, they’re crazy. She shared some some reviews she found in a segment called “A Little Yelp From My Friends”.
Filip wrote a review of a Taco Bell in Chicago that said: “One time I really wanted two bean burritos. But in order to make my meal relatively healthy, I order just one. As I was driving away, I was mad at myself for order just one. Imagine my surprise when I got home and found 2 bean burritos in there!! Mind-reading – now that is taking customer service to the next level.”
The next review was from Vu of the Elmwood Correctional Facility in Milpitas, California. He said they had “the best cheese sandwiches ever” and gave it five stars. Ellen joked “come for the armed robbery, stay for the cheese sandwiches.”
David wrote the following review for a 7-11 in Cupertino, California: “I’ve always been more of an AM/PM man myself, but walking into this 7-11, I knew I was in for a treat. THe best part about it is they advertise that they are open from 7-11, well I was there at about 11:30, either they forgot to close, or they just love staying open! Keep it up 7-11, I’ll be back!” Ellen joked “I’ve just been told David discovered that TGI Friday’s is also open on Saturdays.”
Rose wrote a review of her OBGYN in New York City that said “Thank you, Dr. Goodchild. Best pap smear ever.”