Dr. Phil: Abusive Marriage
Dr. Phil sat down with Jaime and Jay, two parents who are divorced but are considering getting back together for their child. Jaime says that Jay began abusing her on a weekly basis six days into their marriage. He kept doing it even after their 7-month-old son was born.
Jay admits being abusive, but he says Jaime needs to own up to her “erratic” behavior. What’s really going on here? And why does Jaime say she’d get back together with Jay if he got help?
Dr. Phil: Anger Problem

Dr. Phil talked to Jaime and Jay, a divorced couple who are considering getting back together for their kid, despite the husband’s abuse. (Iaroslav Neliubov / Shutterstock.com)
It’s always refreshing on Dr. Phil when someone isn’t trying to hide something, but instead just tells things exactly how they see them, even when that person is a horrible person and has done terrible things. Jay seemed to be holding nothing close to his chest. He admitted right away that he is an abusive husband.
He also admitted to saying the following things:
- “If she weren’t so busy running her mouth, and shut up to listen to me, things would be better.”
- “She interrogates me and asks the same question 50 different ways to piss me off.”
- “She refuses to let me leave and forces me to sit there until I blow.”
- “I don’t have compassion when she is on the ground crying. You just attacked me, I attacked back.”
He said that Jaime pushes him to a point where he resorts to this behavior. Dr. Phil asked him how he could justify his abusive behavior toward Jaime. Jay said he loses control because he has an anger issue. He said when he feels pushed or backed into a corner, he’s “gonna defend himself”. He admitted getting mad a lot. They got evicted because there were 20 complaints against them due to his anger issues.
Dr. Phil: Domestic Violence
Jaime said that she only went to the Emergency Room three times, even though the abuse continued. Jaime said she started covering it up and quit going because the doctors there started to catch on. She wanted to protect Jay. Jay was on parole at the time and she was worried what would happen to him.
Jay has thrown her to the ground, choked her, shoved her into a door, shoved her face into anything nearby, smashed her face, grabbed her by the hair and dragged her, busted her lip, sit on top of her, thrown through a door, told her she has to die, held her over a second floor balcony, destroyed the furniture and anything that means anything to her, and destroyed the wedding photos.
Jay has also keyed his own car to prove to Jaime that he wasn’t materialistic. He also threw coffee on her another time.
Dr. Phil: How Did He React To Her Pregnancy?
Jaime said that when she told him she was pregnant, he said, “Have fun with your pregnancy” and walked away. Jay said that wasn’t his initial response. He said that Jaime came to her when he’d gone to get away from her at his sister’s house. She told him about the pregnancy but they started to argue and then he got mad and said that.
“I said, you know what, screw it then. We started to argue. I said, ‘Screw it then. Have fun with your pregnancy. Go get an abortion for all I give a s***,'” he said.
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