Dr. Phil: Children Involved In Marital Problems
Dr. Phil has been talking to a woman named Lisa who is caught between two men: her husband and her boyfriend. Lisa has been openly cheating on her husband Rick with her boyfriend and the more she cheats, the more Rick tries to control her and keep her away from him. But the boyfriend isn’t the magical person Lisa has painted him out to be.
Dr. Phil found out more about Rick and Lisa’s children and how they’ve been drawn into their marital problems and offered his solution to save their marriage. (klublu / Shutterstock.com)
Lisa’s boyfriend has told Lisa’s son, Jordan, that he’s going to beat him up and has threatened him. Lisa says she doesn’t condone that. However, she’s still with the boyfriend.
Dr. Phil: Children Spying Or Concerned?
Lisa says that her husband Rick has brainwashed her children against her. She says her children will spy on her for him and Rick and her son Jordan even confronted Lisa and her boyfriend in a restaurant, calling her names in front of everybody.
“Rick has turned the kids against me. They’re brainwashed, and they don’t even know it,” Lisa said.
In the studio, Dr. Phil asked Lisa’s daughter, Alexa, how she felt about the situation. Alexa said that she wished her parents would either stay together or split up, but either way make a decision. What they’re doing now just isn’t working.
Dr. Phil: What Are They Modeling For Their Kids?
Dr. Phil wondered what Rick and Lisa were modeling for their kids. Between Lisa’s cheating and Rick’s controlling behavior and all the lies and deceits between the two, there’s no healthy relationship here.
“You’re role modeling everything negative that I could think to put on a list,” Dr. Phil said.
Dr. Phil said that the two of them needed to own up to what they’re doing and make a change.
Dr. Phil: Will She Leave Her Boyfriend?
Dr. Phil asked Lisa what she needed to do. She said she needed to leave her boyfriend. Dr. Phil didn’t think she was going to stop seeing him. Lisa has broken up with her boyfriend five times in the past. Sometimes she’ll leave him for a few days or even a week, but she always comes back. She said she didn’t want to hurt her boyfriend or her husband.
Dr. Phil told her to look at her kids in the audience and asked her if she was hurting them.
Dr. Phil: Can This Marriage Be Saved?
Dr. Phil advised Rick that instead of trying to control his wife and stop her from being with her boyfriend, maybe he should try to give her a reason to want to be with him. He then turned to Lisa and told her that if she invested the time she’s put into this relationship with her boyfriend back into her marriage, she might be in a different place. Lisa said that she and Rick had no communication so that wouldn’t work. Dr. Phil threw his hands up into the air in frustration.
“You’ve got to get yourself in a position where you can hold your head high with your children, with your spouse,” Dr. Phil said. “You will never, ever fix this situation if either one of you are involved with somebody outside the marriage. And if you aren’t willing to stop that, if you’re aren’t willing to say, ‘Leave me alone, I’m going to work on this situation and try to fix it and heal it,’ then you might as well get a divorce because it will never, ever get better.”
Ultimately, Dr. Phil offered the couple resources to repair their marriage and they agreed.
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