Dr Oz: How To Revive a Flatlined Love Life
Dr Oz and psychologist Esther Perel discussed what happens when a couple’s love life flatlines. She shared the five verbs she said can help you to get the passion back in your bedroom.
Dr Oz: 5 Romance Verbs
- Ask
- Take
- Give
- Receive
- Refuse
Dr Oz: Ask Romance Verb
Relationship expert Esther Perel shared her 5 Romance Verbs with Dr Oz’s audience to explain the steps toward rekindling intimacy with your partner.
Perel told Dr Oz’s audience to think of the answer to this question and write it down.
What do I want to Ask my partner?
This can be a request about something that you like to enjoy. When you do experience these things, be sure to speak up and indicate that you enjoy them.
Dr Oz: Take Romance Verb
The next verb is about taking.
What do I want to Take from my partner?
This could be taking more time, touching his hair, or something else that comes to mind. “Taking is one of the hard things for women,” Perel said.
Dr Oz: Give Romance Verb
But any relationship involves compromise, and the next section is about giving back, though Esther did not spend much time on this during Dr Oz’s show.
What do I want to Give to my partner?
Dr Oz: Receive Romance Verb
What do I want to Receive from my partner?
Being self-critical is a turn off, Perel said, so think about yourself in a positive light. Think about this. It might mean receiving compliments about your body, for example.
Dr Oz: Refuse Romance Verb
Last on the list is Refusing. You should be able to do this without feeling guilty.
What do I want to Refuse from my partner?
It is important for you both to set boundaries about what makes you comfortable.
Dr Oz: Rekindling Intimacy with Your Partner
Once you have answered these questions for yourself, share them with your partner, preferably in writing. It can be difficult to think about, and women may fall into a habit of giving without getting in return, Perel told Dr Oz.
What’s important is to move forward with a shared goal of rekindling the passion and growing through emotional intimacy to strengthen your relationship.
As a couple, spend some time discussing each of the intimacy verbs (maybe talk about one each day) to see how you can improve that for one another. Over time, you could see a dramatic improvement in your love life.
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