The Tonight Show Headlines
Just in time for Valentine’s Day, check out the week’s collection of romantic and unsettling headlines, including Valentine’s Day wedding announcements, gifts and unfortunate couple name combinations.
Tonight Show Headlines: Valentine’s Day Gifts
- Nursing home with meth lab will be auctioned March 21
- Treat each other this Valentine’s Day – knife for him, diamonds for her
- Double-seated toilet for couples
- New research says research is valuable; researchers glad
- Vehicle falls through ice as deputy put up ‘thin ice’ sign
- New medical wrinkle removes signs of worry
Jay Leno Headlines: Nasopure Nasal Wash System Review
A list of the most misspelled US cities incorrectly spelled Pittsburgh. A birth announcement listed the child’s weight at 175 lbs, 2 oz.
A mix and match ad suggested making a meal out of ice cream sandwiches and Valentine’s Day candy. Another ad for the Nasopure Nasal Wash System include a photo of the whole family trying the gadget.
The Tonight Show: Waffle Iron Restaurant in Prescott Arizona
A band student was excited about an upcoming trip to China, because “it’s like a different country.” A lost and found ad noted that someone found a large breed female animal pulling a rope, but declined to specify a species.
If you are visiting Arizona, be sure to check out the Waffle Iron restaurant, which the advertisement said is “located in one of Prescott’s old hysterical buildings.” For those interested in purchasing a 2013 Honda FourTrax Rincon, the $8,500 sale price includes a “free avocado.”
Another grocer advertised a sale on Toilet Tuna, while a store display advertised Prewrapped Nose Hair as a great gift idea.
Jay Leno: Valentine’s Day Wedding Announcements
Here are the hilarious name combinations Jay Leno and The Tonight Show viewers found on recent wedding announcements and engagement notices. You might need to read them aloud to catch the jokes.
Tonight Show Headlines Submissions
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