Tonight Show: US Airways Merger
Jay Leno joked about the threat of war from North Korea, recent incidents like the Walmart deer hunt, and the completed American Airlines/US Airways merger.
Jay Leno: Walmart Deer Hunt & Car Incident
The host opened the show by saying that he and NBC have finally come to a mutual agreement, but this was his April Fool’s joke.
At a Pennsylvania Walmart, a man attempted to hunt deer in the parking lot. That’s better than Costco, where you have to hunt in bulk.
At another Walmart in San Jose, a man intentionally drove his car through the front door of the store. “Something American-made inside a Walmart? That is amazing,” Leno said.
The Tonight Show: North Korea War
An Idaho biology teacher got in trouble for talking about anatomy using the anatomically correct terms. Jay Leno said that biology is one place where euphemisms are not helping matters.
The threats of war from North Korea could be serious, depending on how you read photos of Kim Jong-Un with binoculars. Though Los Angeles is a top target, Jay said he is no more scared of North Korea than of Lindsay Lohan.
Tonight Show: Al Gore Birthday
In Tennessee, legislators are targeting low income families by penalizing welfare benefits for children who underperform in school. What do you think about this approach to education?
Former vice president Al Gore turned 65 this week. Jay’s joke was about melting ice cream, but he missed an opportunity relating to retirement age in there somewhere.
Jay Leno: Easter Animal Blessings
At Easter, the archbishop blesses the animals in the congregation. Have you ever participated in this type of ceremony? According to a doctored video, even a brown bear showed up to receive a blessing.
More people have working cellphones than working toilets, according to the United Nations. That’s the same as Carnival Cruises, Jay said.
The Tonight Show: American Airlines Merger
American Airlines and US Airways have merged, now forming the world’s largest airline. This could embolden them to make flight conditions less appealing to travelers, since they have such a large market share.
Pope Francis has turned down his papal apartment, choosing instead to live modestly. He also went down to basic cable, Leno said. Pope Benedict met with Pope Francis recently, vowing to hide from the world for the remainder of his life.
Tonight Show: Geniuses Or Idiots?
In a Geniuses Or Idiots segment, men attempted to unload concrete from a trailer. Were they doing it right or wrong by attempting to roll it onto tires. They managed to crumble the concrete cylinder, making them idiots in the Tonight Show’s estimation.
Justin Bieber’s monkey was quarantined in Germany, and Leno made the obvious connections to Michael Jackson, who also owned his own pet monkey. That would be an interesting, but probably sad, career trajectory to imitate.