Tonight Show: Hugo Chavez & Pope Francis
The Tonight Show monologue mentioned the election of Pope Francis from Argentina as well as the Hugo Chavez estate, which was pretty rich for someone who did not believe in capitalism. Plus, have you heard about the Oreo Separator?
The Tonight Show: Pope Francis of Argentina
Jay Leno brought a message of “pope and change” upon the election of the new Argentinian Pope Francis. The worldwide celebrations have included prayer, singing, and super sized sodas.
“Beyonce lip synced the Vatican Anthem,” he joked. The assembled followers praying in the square reminded Leno of the Carnival Triumph cruise debacle.
Jay Leno: Hugo Chavez Estate
Though the cardinals have selected a pope, now they are moving on to find a replacement for Joy Behar on The View. In video from his first blessing, Jay thought he spied Dennis Rodman on the Vatican balcony.
Recently deceased Hugo Chavez collected approximately $2 billion in personal wealth while running the country. Leno suspected he would have done even better as a capitalist.
Tonight Show: Oreo Separator Review
Astronauts are now training to visit Mars by visiting Utah. “You know the difference between Utah and Mars?” Jay asked. “Mars has a nightlife.”
Then there is the man who invented the Oreo separator. Jay suggested better technology to separate Americans from their cookies.
The Tonight Show: Mr Inappropriate News Anchor
There is a new bra that lets women enhance their appearance by filling the garment with wine. Instead, Jay suggested just getting your date drunk to make it seem like objects are bigger.
A news anchor from WGN Chicago was the subject of the Tonight Show’s Mr Inappropriate segment. He was reporting on a story about a woman who attempted to smuggle a gun into jail inside her body.
“I know some women who could hide a machine gun in there,” the anchor said. That is definitely inappropriate, which is not to say it didn’t get a laugh from the studio audience.