Late Show: Daniel Day-Lewis Oscar Record & Tony Mendez Argo Parody

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Late Show: Michelle Obama Oscars

Dave’s show tonight included a musical performance by Emmylou Harris. But first, if you hadn’t heard them all yet, there were still a few more jokes and observations from the Academy Awards. Check out the new Daniel Day-Lewis Oscar record and the trophy Dave said Michelle Obama received.

David Letterman: Daniel Day-Lewis Oscar Record

Late Show: Daniel Day-Lewis Oscar Record & Tony Mendez Argo Parody

David Letterman shared his thoughts about the Oscars, including the historic Daniel Day-Lewis Oscar record and a Tony Mendez Argo parody in the studio. (Featureflash / Shutterstock.com)

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The Academy Awards finally happened last night, and Dave complained about the show’s length. “By the middle of the show, George Clooney had changed girlfriends,” he joked. “The audience was begging Daniel Day-Lewis to free them.”

Day-Lewis became the first person to win three Oscars. “It was one of Lincoln’s better nights in a theater,” despite losing out to Argo for best picture.

Late Show: Argo Best Picture

From the Oscars audience, the Late Show found a clip of a woman clapping her purse during an ovation and wondered whether it was the woman’s first time applauding.

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The movie Argo, about “heroic Hollywood producers,” was the night’s best picture. Meanwhile, “First Lady Michelle Obama won an Academy Award for best bangs.”

With all the complaints about the awards shows and the lengthy acceptance speeches, Dave said that there was finally an innovation to address the drawn out speeches. In a clip from the Argo acceptance speech, a man came out and broke the microphone in half.

David Letterman: Government Sequestration

Raoul Castro announced he will resign in 2018, “because he is still making payments on his 1956 Chevy.” That is much more notice than the two weeks or so that Pope Benedict turned in.

With the fiscal cliff and the debt ceiling now behind us, another financial threat to the nation is looming. The sequestering is almost upon us, and Dave said that it is confusing but scary. Budget cuts will kick in on Friday.

Among the cuts will be airport security, and “now we have to go back to patting ourselves down.”

Late Show: Tony Mendez Argo Parody

Tony Mendez, the real life CIA agent behind the hostage rescue depicted in Iran, happens to have the same name as David Letterman’s cue card man, Tony Mendez. At that, cue card man Tony helped six people escape from the studio audience.

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