Late Show: New York City Commute
The Late Show monologue featured a Meteor Fragment Buyers Guide, more thoughts about the pope, and the Burger King Twitter account hacking.
A New York Times article said that the average New Yorker has a 31-minute commute. Dave said that he avoids this issue by living at the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Late Show: Meteor Fragment Buyers Guide
The meteors that exploded over Russia caused some serious damage and resulting in some stunning video. Now, citizens are collecting meteor fragments, so Dave shared some helpful advice on how to know whether your meteor is valuable.
The real thing would have a “dense, stony composition with 10% iron content.” But a fake meteor might squeak like a dog toy, according to the Late Show. That is a fairly simple test, I guess.
David Letterman: Academy Awards
The Academy Awards are coming up soon, and Dave said he cast his vote for Meryl Streep as Lincoln. “I think she did a tremendous job,” he said. The message of Lincoln is that Democrats and Republicans working together counts as science fiction.
In a live feed from NASA, Dave showed Highclere Castle, the setting of Downton Abbey, getting hit by a meteor. That would be breaking news.
Late Show: Burger King Twitter Hacked
The Burger King Twitter account was recently hacked and turned into an advertisement for McDonald’s. Dave said that the bigger problem is that so many people are following Burger King on Twitter.
Letterman continues to insist that Pope Benedict has been fired from his position, and predicted Denny’s soup would be in his future. The pope’s desk might be the only job where you would have a photo of your boss’s son on your desk.
The current pope is deaf in one ear and slightly blind, according to Dave, but was very good at pinball.
David Letterman: John McCain Judgement
If you watch Sunday morning political talk shows, you might have seen John McCain questioning President Obama’s judgement. Letterman said that the bigger judgement error was choosing Sarah Palin as a vice presidential candidate. This is a topic he thought McCain should never weigh in on.
Michelle Obama’s famous bangs have been getting a lot of notice lately. She said that the bangs were part of her midlife crisis. Dave said that his own midlife crisis has driven him to drink. “Short bangs would describe the midlife crisis of Arnold Schwarzenegger,” Letterman said.