Jimmy Kimmel Live: March Madness Bracket & Lindsay Lohan Probation

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Jimmy Kimmel: St. Patrick’s Day & March Madness

Jimmy Kimmel returned from vacation to talk about the greatest St. Patrick’s Day video ever and advice from his cousin on filling out your March Madness bracket.

Jimmy Kimmel Live: St. Patrick’s Day Leprechaun News Video

St. Patrick’s Day was recently observed, and according to Jimmy, Patrick is the patron saint of public urination. “Is St. Patrick’s Day supposed to honor Ireland or shame Ireland?” he wondered.

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Getting drunk is a holiday tradition, but Jimmy said that he and his staff have a tradition of their own, showing some of the best news clips of all time. Mobile, Alabama news reports of a leprechaun sighting are timeless, if you have never seen them.

Jimmy Kimmel Live: March Madness Bracket & Lindsay Lohan Probation

Jimmy Kimmel shared some advice for filling out the March Madness bracket from his cousin Mickey and Lindsay Lohan’s new probation sentence.

The probably intoxicated residents were in agreement that they had seen a leprechaun. Then there is the eyewitness sketch that may have resembled “an acorn with eyes.”

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“Could be a crackhead [that] got hold of the wrong stuff,” one woman opined in the archival news footage.

Jimmy Kimmel: Dancing With The Stars

Another season of Dancing With The Stars has kicked off, blazing new trails in defining the words “dancing” and “star.” The cast includes a soap star, a singer, an actor, and other familiar names, including Andy Dick.

The surprise contestant was The Bachelor’s Sean Lowe, whose popularity led a ratings resurgence for the show. Kimmel said he guessed correctly on whom The Bachelor would choose, so maybe he can advise us on our Dancing With The Stars brackets.

Jimmy Kimmel Live: March Madness Mick’s Picks

The NCAA March Madness tournament is kicking off, and everyone is filling out their brackets. Do you have a strategy for making your picks? Since the person in your office who knows the least about basketball usually wins, Kimmel asked his Cousin Mickey to share her thought process.

She made her selections based on her favorite ice cream, personal preferences and which team names she liked the most. I don’t know that I would take her advice, but I’m curious to see how her bracket turns out.

She said that she thinks Bucknell will win the tournament. “Go with your gut, not with your head,” she suggested.

Jimmy Kimmel: Lindsay Lohan Probation

Lindsay Lohan showed up late for her probation hearing, and Jimmy suggested that she steal a watch. Somehow she got someone to loan her a private jet, and she was still late to court.

After her guilty plea, she was sentenced to 90 days in a rehab facility, 30 days of community service, and 18 months of therapy. Kimmel suggested throwing in a viewing of her Lifetime movie, Liz and Dick.

Jimmy Kimmel Live: Sarah Palin CPAC

Tiger Woods announced via social media that he is dating Olympic skier Lindsey Vonn. He said that, while this is good news for Woods, it probably can’t end well for Vonn.

Sarah Palin spoke at the CPAC Conference in Maryland recently. She took a shot at Mayor Bloomberg’s soda regulation, guzzling from a Big Gulp on the stage.

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