Ellen’s Lost & Found Jewelry Bag: Property of Johnny Depp’s Right Arm

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Ellen: Social Cues

Ellen’s show began with a discussion of social cues, a phenomenal dancer of the day and of course Ellen’s Celebrity Lost and Found (including a massive bag of jewelry belonging to none other than Johnny Depp’s right arm!).

When Ellen walked onstage, she told her audience that they make the perfect guests.

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“You arrive on time, you clap as soon as you see me, and an hour later you leave!” she said.

Ellen's Celebrity Lost & Found Jewelry Bag: Property of Johnny Depp's Right Arm

Ellen finds a bag of jewelry for Johnny Depp's right arm. (Image Credit: Featureflash / Shutterstock.com)

This joke was really her way of introducing a longer segment of commentary about guests and social cues. She said she had some people over for dinner recently and by 8:30 p.m. the guests still hadn’t left.

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“That’s two hours past my bedtime,” she said. “CoverGirls need their beauty sleep.”

Ellen said she was dropping subtle hints that they had overstayed their welcome but “they weren’t getting it.” She said that while playing Pictionary, she even drew pictures of her guests walking out the door, but even then, they still didn’t get the hint. The situation was only solved when Ellen reached out her arms, feigned a yawn, and pretended to look at her watch, though she didn’t actually have one, and said, “Would you look at the time…”

“Would you look at the time is one of those social cues that everybody understands,” Ellen said. “Like when some one invites you up to coffee at 10 p.m.”

She continued to joke about socially accepted cues and hints but then brought the gag full circle by saying to the audience, “I could talk forever, but look at the time.”

Ellen: Dancer of the Day

Ellen showed a video clip of her “Dancer of the Day.” The dancer was a woman who had a very fun and informal dancing style, the kind you’d expect at a club. She was spunky. Some of her moves were slightly hackneyed, but it was clear she wasn’t a professional dancer, so it just seemed adorably dorky.

The camera found the dancer in the audience. She was a really great sport about the whole thing, laughing and smiling a lot. She told Ellen she was from Western Australia.

Ellen: Celebrity Lost-And-Found

“We finally did some spring cleaning around here,” Ellen said. “It turns out a lot of our guests leave things behind so I thought it’d be fun to go through our lost and found.”

A stage-hand brought out a big box of lost-and-found items and Ellen proceeded to take out each item and share them with the audience. It was clear that none of the items actually belonged to any of her guests. The entire segment was a just a gag.

Jessica Simpson’s What to Expect When You’re Expecting for 18 Months

The first item she pulled out was a book called What to Expect When You’re Expecting for 18 Months, which Ellen said belonged to Jessica Simpson.

Johnny Depp’s Jewelry

The second item was a huge bag of jewelry that said “property of Johnny Depp‘s right arm.”

Tony Okungbowa’s Sexy Seniors Magazine

The third and final item Ellen pulled out of the box was an issue of Sexy Seniors Magazine that she said belonged to her pianist, Tony Okungbowa.

Jason Derulo Wears Ellen’s Underwear?

Ellen sent her receptionist Jeannie and one of her favorite audience members, Keri, to be her correspondents at the Billboard Music Awards.

Keri was a double shot of espresso with four packets of sugar and no cream. She was bright and lively but it was a little overwhelming at times, though everyone on the show seemed to adore her for it.

Keri and Jeannie talked to a lot of popular celebrities on the red carpet before the awards ceremony, including Taylor Swift, Gavin Degraw, The Wanted, Nelly Furtado, Carrie Underwood, Miley Cyrus, Justin Bieber, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jason Derulo, Jordin Sparks, Taio Cruz, Rae Jepsen.

The funniest moment of the interviews was undoubtedly when Jason Derulo said that he always wears a pair of underwear that Ellen gave him. Another moment that was amusing was when Taylor Swift said that she loved Ellen because she is good at making people seem funny even when they aren’t. Taylor said she especially appreciated that quality when she’s a guest on the show.

All in all it was a funny segment, but it relied too heavily on Keri being obnoxiously emphatic in everything she did. Every time she talked, she would laugh and shout about how much she loved and adored Ellen and all of the other celebrities. Every time she moved, she would fling her arms all over the place, clap her hands, and jump up and down. It was a bit too much. But no one else seemed to care.

After the segment, Ellen made a point to say, “I love you Keri!”

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