Ellen: My Fair and Square Lady Finale
Ellen ended her 1500th episode with the finale of her comically melodramatic miniseries “My Fair and Square Lady.” The scene was very silly and arbitrary, focused more on making people laugh than relating any type of story.
It began with her walking down the stairs in a frumpy white and black dress. Upon reaching the bottom of the stairs, she found her lover asleep on her ottoman. Ellen tells the unconscious man to dream that he’s in a forest and starts spraying pine scent into his face. She pulls out an aerosol can of whipped cream and starts spraying it all over his face.
Mario Lopez Kisses Ellen
Suddenly Mario Lopez dramatically enters the room, making ham expressions to add to the melodrama.
After chatting with Ellen, Lopez asks, “Is it just me or is it hot in here?”
Playing off of her longstanding tradition of asking Lopez to take off his shirt during interviews, Ellen said, “I’m not hot but if you are, you should take your shirt off.”
Lopez took his shirt off, but had another shirt on underneath it. Ellen admired it and asked him where he bought it. Lopez said he bought it at JCPenny.
“I’ve always said that JCPenny has great prices for great merchandise,” Ellen said.
Lopez‘s character became impatient and said, “Shut up and kiss your pool-boy!”
Lopez and Ellen then engaged in a long passionate session of french kissing until she pushed him away.
“Wait a minute,” she said. “I just remembered I don’t have a pool!”
“WHO ARE YOU???”
The scene ended and a teaser for the next episode was shown with Ellen‘s character saying, “Sticky buns? I’ll show you sticky buns.”