Ellen: P90X Vs Insanity workouts
“I woke up early today,” Ellen said at the start of her show. “I did some push-ups. I did some sit-ups. I did some jumping jacks and Portia said, ‘Will you please get out of bed?'”
Ellen told this story to introduce the topic of fitness. She said that Summer was around the corner and then encouraged her audience to start working out now.
“You can tell it’s bathing suit season because now at night they’re starting to show the commercial for the P90X,” she said.
Ellen said that she’s seen even crazier workouts than that. She then introduced a lesser-known out video called Insanity. She showed several fake videos for the workout.
Ellen: Retro Workout Videos
The first fake video was a retro clip of three women who had their heads on the floor and their legs folded over top of their heads while their feet walked around in circles. Although it wasn’t a real workout video, it sure looked insane.
Introducing the next fake video, Ellen said, “Here’s the real clip–it seriously kicks your butt!”
The video was an old slapstick clip of a man standing in front of a wheel with shoes that spun around and kicked him in the butt.
Then Ellen showed the real video for the Insanity workout. It was just a bunch of people jumping repeatedly in a gym.
Ellen: Kate Upton Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition
Ellen told fans not to buy the workout, because she had found a better one.
“Don’t order this insanity workout because I’ve created something even better,” she said. “It comes with 12 DVDS, lawn darts, and a bottle of Jack Daniels.”
She called her mock workout Absurdity. To prove its efficacy, she jokingly showed a picture of a woman who used her workout video. The picture was of an obese woman named Kate.
“Look at her now,” Ellen said. “Kate come out.”
Kate Upton: Sports Illustrated Cover
Then Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Kate Upton walked onstage.
“I worked out an hour a day for a whole four days,” Kate said. “But it really worked because my body is absurd.”
“Thanks to me, now you’re on the cover of the 2011 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue,” Ellen teased.
Ellen: Tony Buns of Steel
“Tony, I found one of your old workout videos,” she said as she pulled out a VHS titled Buns of Steel. The cover had a picture of the backside a buff man in a speedo with Tony‘s face photoshopped on top of it.