Ellen: Daylight Saving Time & Comedy Spring Cleaning

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Ellen: Daylight Saving Time

Are you having trouble with the adjustment to Daylight Saving Time? Ellen said she is still struggling with the morning darkness, and it’s also wreaking havoc on her technological ineptitude.

“I was trying to feel around to turn off my alarm clock. By the time I found it, I had called the cops and erased my TiVo,” she said.

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Ellen: Daylight Saving Time

Ellen wondered why we go through Daylight Saving Time, losing an hour at 2 a.m.

Ellen: Why Do We Spring Forward

Ellen heard as a child that Daylight Saving Time was designed to give farmers more time to harvest. She said we should all give farmers a hand so they can create faster tractors.

“That’s another hour of my life I’ll never get back, when I’m behind a tractor,” she said. “Those guys drive slow.”

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Ellen: No Daylight Saving Time in Arizona

Arizona is one place that does not participate in Daylight Saving Time, the annual practice of moving the clocks ahead one hour in March, only to move them back in October.

Ellen said we should all be allowed to lose an hour whenever we want, instead of the middle of the night. She said it would come in handy when trying to get dull houseguests to leave.

Are you for or against the annual Daylight Saving Time ritual?

Ellen DeGeneres also welcomed everyone to Spring, which officially begins this year on March 20 2012.

Ellen: Comedy Spring Cleaning

Just in time for the arrival of Spring, Ellen DeGeneres dusted off the leftovers from some of her favorite show segments. Here are the Spring Cleaning highlights she dredged up.

Ellen: Bad Paid For Tattoos

Ellen sometimes features viewer submitted tattoos gone wrong.

Nikki from Texas turned in her friend’s misspelled tattoo, which reads “No Regerts.”

Read about more Bad Paid For Tattoos.

Ellen: Hot Glam Girl

If you’ve been the victim of a gauzy Glamour Shot from the ‘80s or ‘90s, you can get catharsis via Ellen’s show.

Kathleen from Pennyslvania turned in her mother-in-law’s Glamour Shot. The mature woman is clutching pearls and a white feather boa to her chest. She may also be giving a look with her eyes, but I can’t tell if it’s intentional.

Read about Ellen’s Hot Glam Girl Game.

Ellen: Awesome Album Covers

You know someone spends a lot of time designing album or CD cover art. Some of them end up being mocked on TV anyway.

Annie from Arizona sent in a phonograph record called Everybody’s Welcome at Mrs. Mills Party, featuring a plump woman playing the piano.

Ellen: What’s Wrong With These Photos

Sandy from Ohio sent in a book found in a bookstore. The sales sticker covered up some of the letters, so the title read “Little Ho on the Prairie.”

Read about Ellen’s Wrong Signs.

Ellen: Audience Facebook Photos

Ellen also likes to go through her audience’s Facebook profiles looking for incriminating photos. In the picture Ellen found, Tina was celebrating Christmas, sitting in a sexy young Santa’s lap.

Tina was totally embarrassed and said that her favorite holiday is actually Halloween. “I hope you got what you wanted,” Ellen said.

Ellen DeGeneres’s Nieces

Ellen showed DJ Tony a picture of her nieces, Eva and Perry. She said they are dressing more like Sophia Grace and Rosie, the young rappers featured on Ellen’s show.

Read more about Sophia Grace & Rosie, the Tutu Girls.

Ellen Dance Song: “Running Away”

Ellen and her audience danced to the song “Running Away” by Roy Ayers.

Click here to download an MP3 of Roy Ayers’ “Running Away.”

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