Ellen: President’s Day
Happy President’s Day, everyone! Ellen hopes you sent something nice to President Obama, like a tie or some discount Valentine’s candy, just something to show that you care.
Ellen: Cash For Kindness
Last week was “Random Acts of Kindness” week on Ellen, but Ellen wants you to be kind every day. So she sent her staffer Amy to Ikea in Burbank, California to catch some strangers doing random acts of kindness. Amy wore a fake pregnancy belly and knocked things over to attract kind strangers.
She hit the jackpot with Mindy, a woman who was shopping for her wedding. Ellen had Amy test out Mindy’s patience and kindness before telling her she was on candid camera. Ellen sent for her and she appeared on the episode later.
Ellen had her fans send her videos of “koala-ing.” It’s where you jump on someone – friend, sibling, parent, babysitter – and wrap your arms around the person like a koala bear. Many have tried and very few succeed.
Ellen, Here’s My Talent
Ellen wants you to send her your talent. Go on YouTube and title your videos, “Ellen, Here’s My Talent!” You could win $10,000.
Russ can imitate a pterodactyl. He showed us a picture of a pterodactyl then pulled his lips out and screeched. “How do you know what that sounds like?” Ellen laughed.
Then, an older woman touched her tongue to her nose and her chin. It was a little bit gross, but when paired with the pterodactyl sound it was even more disturbing.
Ellen: Clumsy Thumbsy
Who doesn’t love a good autocorrect mistake?
A: I wish I could decorate your panties. I would cover every inch with owls
B: DID YOU MEAN PANTIES OR PARTIES?!?!?!
A: PARTIES, PARTIES, NOT PANTIES!! Foreskin autocorrect!
A: Omg. I’m never texting again.
A: I saw you looking at that slut today at the mall.
B: Sorry. I didn’t mean to. I love you.
A: Oops I just realized I put slut instead of suit.
A: Wait what?
A: Jen and I are going skiing Saturday. Wanna go? Feel free to inflate your girlfriend and bring her too.
A: INVITE! Laughing so hard. Sorry.