Howie Mandel: Chip Shoulder Troll
When Howie Mandel walked onto Ellen‘s stage, “Don’t Stand So Close to Me,” from The Police‘s Zenyatta Mondatta was playing in the background. This was a funny gag because Howie is openly germaphobic.
As he was walking to his seat, a prop that was sitting on Howie‘s shoulder fell. Once he sat down, he explained to Ellen that the figurine perched on his shoulder was named Chip. It looked like a tiny bright red troll with frayed black hair. Howie explained that Chip keeps him from looking “like an idiot” when he’s using his Bluetooth headset.
“People think you’re talking to yourself,” he said. “This way, you don’t look like an idiot.”
“You have a ‘chip’ on your shoulder,” Ellen quipped.
“Do you know what the most amazing thing is?” Howie asked and when Ellen responded, Howie joked, “I’m not talking to you–I’m talking to [Chip].”
Howie Mandel & Howard Stern on America’s Got Talent
Howie said it’s funny to be sharing America’s Got Talent judge responsibilities with Howard Stern, because they have the same name.
Howie said that a crew member brought him a bottle of Cristal with a note that said the new season would be the best yet. Then the crew member apologized saying, “Sorry! Wrong Howard.”
Talking more seriously about Stern, Howie said that he’s great to work with.
“I have been a fan of Howard for years,” Howie said. “He’s such a compassionate, emotional, funny, serious judge.”
Howie Mandel’s Germaphobic
Howie admitted that he’s very socially awkward.
“I don’t touch anybody,” he said.
He laughed and added, “I’m not a big conversationalist with strangers.”
Howie said that when people recognize him, he pretends to be engaged in the conversation but then innocently wards off their interest.
“I act like I’m really engaged but then if you play ‘got your nose,’ that stops that,” he said.
Hitler Howie Mandel
“Somebody painted a picture of me,” Howie said.
“Here’s the thing,” he said as he pulled out the painting. “What is this?”
The painting looked like a very accurate rendition of Howie, except that it had a moustache that bore an uncanny resemblance to Hitler’s moustache.
“If Hitler and Ben Kingsley had a child, this is what it would look like,” Howie said.
Ellen loved the painting.
“I would like to own that,” Ellen said. “I need new art so that’s great.”
Howie showed Ellen a papier mache model a fan made of his head that was dented in the back.
“Is this me? does it look like me?” Howie asked. “I’m very flattered. Somebody worked very hard and made this and thought, ‘Aw he’s gonna love this.'”
Though he agreed to give Ellen the painting of him, Howie refused to give her the papier mache model.
“I’m keeping the papier mache thing,” he said. “It’s a centerpiece in our dining room.”
The last piece of fan art Howie showed Ellen was a stuffed doll that a fan had knit of him. He said that he’d been carrying the doll on flights and he comically cuddled with the doll and stuck his thumb in his mouth.
Ellen: Fan Art
Ellen showed Howie several paintings that fans had made of her.
The first was a relatively accurate portrait of her that Howie liked so much that Ellen gave it to him.
The second was hysterical because it depicted Ellen wearing a white collared shirt with a black vest and obnoxiously oversized gym shorts.
“Here’s an outfit I wear often,” she said. “I’ll be on my way to a basketball game or something and I’ll be wearing my vest and I’ll be laughing.”
Howie laughed and said it looked like “somebody’s dad in his boxer shorts.”
The last painting was less comical, but had particular emphasis on Ellen‘s breasts. Howie was amused and gestured at them.