Ellen: Kelly Clarkson ‘Mr. Know It All’ Performance Review

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Ellen: Kelly Clarkson Promotes Stronger

Kelly Clarkson stopped by Ellen to promote her new album, Stronger. She performed her hit song, “Mr. Know It All.”

Ellen: Kelly Clarkson “Mr. Know It All” Performance Review

To any fans of Kelly Clarkson, I apologize, because I can’t stand her music. Accordingly, I didn’t enjoy her performance. In fact, I found it excruciatingly annoying.

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Kelly Clarkson Stronger: Ellen

Kelly Clarkson gave a very uninspiring performance of "Mr. Know It All" on Ellen. (Featureflash / Shutterstock.com)

Neither the song nor the performance had any character. It was a standard cookie cutter, verse-chorus pop song.

There was an acoustic guitar that jangled lifelessly in the background. There two electric guitars, for why I cannot be sure, because neither of them did much. All they did was hit chords on the downbeat and then let them ring melodramatically over the jangle of the acoustic guitar.

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There was a piano and a bass as well. But neither really added any notable dynamics to the song.

On top of all of that, I don’t understand the appeal of the lyrics at all. Lines like, “Let’s be clear baby this is goodbye” make it clear that the song was written to a former lover. So, the person the speaker is addressing likely knows the speaker very well. Yet, the speaker is upset with the subject and thus tells him, to the bitter point of redundancy, “You don’t know a thing about me.”

How is this meaningful? People have enough trouble acting remotely mature within the context of relationships, failed or otherwise, do we really need poorly written pop songs that perpetuate our egocentrism?

Ellen: Kelly Clarkson Does Yoga

After her lackluster performance, Kelly sat down to chat with Ellen and the first thing Ellen noticed was how good Kelly looked.

“You look fantastic!” Ellen said to the popstar.

“I started doing yoga because my therapist told me to start it,” Kelly explained.

Kelly said that yoga is very hard for her.

“Even sitting there is hard for me,” she said. “I can’t focus. I have no off button.”

However, Kelly said that after starting yoga, her “happiness level skyrocketed.”

Ellen: Kelly Clarkson’s Crush On Kyle Chandler

Kelly told Ellen that she recently developed a serious crush for Kyle Chandler.

“I found out he was married so I can’t stalk him now,” she joked.

Ellen asked Kelly what she liked about him and she said, “They don’t make them like that anymore.”

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