Ellen: Spring Has Sprung
In honor of spring, Ellen pulled out the Boomerang Blitz game for a spring edition. It always more competitive if the people know each other. Two best friends faced off. In the first round, they broke Ellen’s boomerang in half. That’s not supposed to happen, but Andy had an extra.
The girls had to tell time, name off cleaning products and name celebs they would like to shower with. Natalie was whooping her friend. I think Tonya was just too small to run and grab it. Natalie won the round and got a 42” Insignia TV.
Ellen Pillow With Felt Decorations
Coming back from her vacation, Ellen had a ton of mail. A fan from Chicago sent Ellen a pillow with her face on it. That’s not all. You get a felt book with things to dress Ellen up in. I particularly liked French Ellen with a mustache and beret.
Ellen: Weekly Tweetly Roundup
Lauren McGuire: “I like that all the Ikea instructions always assume I have a friend.”
Annabel Oakes: “You can tell yourself that Sesame Street is educational, but Cookie Monster has lived there for 40 years and still can’t conjugate verbs.”
Spoonicorn: “Why is there Head & Shoulders shampoo? Who has hair on their shoulders? Who’s shampooing their shoulder hair? Please come forward.”
Sarah Thyre: “No smartphones for my kids. They need to suffer years of fleeting, awkward eye contact with strangers like I did.”
Ellen: Clumsy Thumbsy
I’m waiting for the day when my phone has the autocorrect golden text so that I can send it to Ellen. In the meantime, these other people are having embarrassing conversations.
A: Your package has aroused.
A: Feel free to send that to Ellen.
Then, it got really awkward. I wonder why this person’s phone knows one word and not the other. I feel like this happens to me all the time, but my phone wants to use YOLO and I don’t.
A: I need a hairball.
A: Hairy Ball.
A: Haircut. Why does my phone know the words hairy ball and not haircut?
Also, apparently this phone knows it’s drug slang.
A: How are you?
B: Good. We had reefer with my mom’s side of the family.
B: Easter, I mean Easter. Not reefer.
A: Well apparently that word has been recognized as a commonly used word on your phone.